marginal utility of money

Something our boss said this morning hit home more than I care to admit. He said the marginal utility of money is very small, much smaller than we give it credit for. When you've earned enough to cover your basic necessities, the quest for additional money just to keep up with the luxuries of life is often where you get into trouble. Definitely, when you are in need of money, because you cannot cover the basic needs of you and your family, then money is at its most use (and of most importance) to you. Then you crave more, to cover life's little luxuries, which I guess is still okay. After all, what differentiates life from existence is quality. And certain aspects of a quality life do require some measure of money. For example, travel is life-enriching but is also a rather expensive hobby. Education is another, though basic education would mean getting educated here whereas "luxury education" would mean a foreign degree or even an additional degree like an MBA. You would also need a cushion to cover a rainy day (or days, as last week proved to be), especially when you have aging parents or many dependents or simply just for your sanity. In Manila too, a car is almost a necessity, as is the occasional movie and dinner date to destress.

However, after you've checked those marks, and you crave more money, you'll find this incremental moolah to deliver way less than what the earlier amounts did, at least in terms of satisfaction and happiness. In fact, you'll discover that what you need to sacrifice, in the name of this additional money, may cost you more than the benefits to be derived by the possession of these incremental pesos. Such examples are time with your family, your health, your spiritual life, or simply just your life. In the quest for more money, you run faster and faster on the hamster wheel, only to end up not being able to enjoy the very money for which you exerted that much effort for. Worse, after earning so much money, you find yourself dying due to the stress of the quest.

So I guess the point is to continually reflect and evaluate the "point" in everything we do, including everything we sacrifice. There's obviously a tradeoff, and the reward that you're working for may or may not end up to be as satisfying as it appeared to be in your head.

Definitely, at this age, my husband and I are still very much justified to stay in the rat race. After all, we don't have children yet, and I've heard children tend to cost a substantial amount of money. Plus, we do have dreams yet to be achieved, before we can say we've had enough of our work. But it's good to see this perspective from a 50-year-old marketing veteran and learn that, after a certain point, you really don't need "more" anymore. Life is not about that at all. What's tricky is knowing where to draw the line and keep your sights at it, no matter the temptation (whether in your head or through people around you). Hopefully, you'll also be brave enough to get off the horse when you need to, in recognition of better things to allocate your time, effort and attention for, even if these things do not appear in a bank statement or chequebook. Unlike in the corporate world, achievements in life are not supposed to be in numerical format.

:)

building a pipeline or hauling buckets

I stumbled upon this story from a blog of a friend and wanted to post it here so I won't forget it. I feel it can be related to many things in life, most obviously to the ever-lingering idea of setting up my own business vs staying in this corporate rat race forever. Read on!

Are you building a pipeline or hauling buckets?

A village in Africa needed water, so they gave 2 people, Bill and Ed, the contract to supply it, reasoning that the competition would keep prices reasonable and the service good. Bill immediately ran out, bought to buckets, and started making the trek to and from the lake, which was a mile away. He started making money immediately, which was great, especially as Ed disappeared from the village. The downside was that he had to get up before everybody else to make sure that the village had the water, and his work was very tiring, as he spent his whole day carrying buckets of water.

Several months later, Ed returned with a construction crew, and built a stainless steel pipe from the lake to the village. Once it was ready, he announced that he would charge 75% less for his water than Bill, that his water would be cleaner than Bill’s, because it would be covered the whole way, and that it would run 24/7, unlike Bill’s, because Bill didn’t work on weekends.

When Bill saw everybody run to the new faucet at the end of Ed’s pipeline, he dropped his prices by 75%, bought covers for his buckets, and employed his sons to work night and weekend shifts. Once his sons had left for college (and inexplicably never returned), he had to hire more workers to cover their costs, and spent his days dealing with accounting and labor issues.

Ed saw the success of his pipeline in this village, and went on to build them in several other villages as well, earning only pennies on every bucket delivered, but delivering millions of buckets a day. He oversees his business from a beach in Hawaii, as the water flows whether he is working or not.

THE END

The story ends with this advice: don’t spend your days working for money when you could be designing systems to have money flowing to, and working for you. But I feel that it can be related to so many more things other than money. Are you sacrificing long-term gains for short-term contentment? Are you missing the bigger picture in the quest to have something solid now? Are you building a pipeline or hauling buckets?!

"Not much to look forward to this year"...

Some of my friends said this at the top of the year, especially in the context of 2010 being a action-packed, exciting year for all of us, peppered with memories of weddings and babies. I couldn’t relate to this feeling at first, since we had our Europe trip (of the decade!) in the pipeline during that period. I was too busy looking up itineraries, comparing hotels, preparing flight schedules, etc, to feel that there’s not much to look forward to. My heart was so full of excitement and happy anticipation. Now that that has peaked and we’re back to regular life, I can’t help but agree with the statement now. Especially given the recent work challenges, which either pull me to the direction of feeling work is so humdrum, or haul me back to the other direction of feeling overwhelmed and tired by this new assignment. Granted, the resurrection of my teaching career does put an exclamation point to my weekly sched, and my MBA does keep me extra busy, but I don’t know, I feel like something is off. Or, better said, something seems dissatisfying. I can’t quite pinpoint what it is exactly. All I know is what it is NOT about – I’m 100% happy with my marriage and 100% happy with my personal and student-related lives. I have a sneaking suspicion it’s about work.. and about my impatience with the next stage in life.

There's no solid point to this post. I just wanted to jot down this feeling, in hopes of untangling the mixed emotions and finding the center of it all. I'll let you know if it worked...

Not this time :(

Erased my last post about crossing fingers for good news this month because, well, the good news didn't come. I would be lying if I said we're not disappointed. Frankly, the feeling resembles heartbreak way too closely- and I doubt we can be faulted. The signs all pointed there, and I can be sure that while some may arguably just reside in the place in my heart that really wants it to come true, the other signs were so real they really had us fooled :(

Oh well, no use agonizing. We can always try again.

And let it be said that I have the best husband in the world. Hope every girl out there finds someone as devoted and as loving, to be with in good times and sad :(

Guam Guam

OK, this is an update from my earlier blog post today. Due to several circumstantial roadblocks to our plan to go to Bora, we've revised the plan and moved the destination to...

GUAM!

The biggest dependency for this plan, though, is a Mabuhay Miles Half-Off promotion. It's a showstopper (or show-go-er, depending on how you look at it), because we plan to use my miles to go Guam for free! (Thank you to Citibank Premier Miles VISA card!) Definitely a much better beach destination for us, and it also allows us to hit a second bird with the same stone - getting our US visas renewed! Yooohooo! I'm definitely more psyched about this plan. I really really pray it pans out.

:D

Bora Bora

I wish a thousand million times that PAG-ASA does NOT declare the end of summer by the end of this week. Just when we decided to go to Bora (in about 2 weeks' time), this happens. GRR GRR GRR!

Please! Extend summer just a teeny bit longer!!!!

wannatrepreneur

I came across this term and found it funny because it's supposed to refer to someone who always talks about being an entrepreneur but never actually does it. I can sooo relate! Haha! I've always had the intention to get into a side business, have thought up a handful of ideas of what to do, have talked some of those ideas to death with my husband,... and yet, nothing has materialized! Truly a wannatrepeneur.

Anyway, I had a lightbulb moment again the other day, a truly lucrative idea, but it seems like there's no available commercial area in my building. I have yet to scour nearby locations for an available space, and I don't know when I will actually do this "scouring", given the heat outside. A part of this wannatrepreneur in me tells me to go and do it already. Find a spot and open this business. But then the other more conservative part of me thinks maybe I should simply wait for a spot to open up and land on my lap. Tsk tsk. What to do..?

I really think I'm on to something good. I think I just need to that extra push to get the ball rolling....

:)

Teacher Teacher!!

I'm so glad to have been invited back to teaching. I must admit, I missed it! I took a 1-year hiatus from teaching, because first semester coincided with my wedding (and the months leading up to it). Since I also had my MBA to juggle work and wedding preps with, I didn't want to overload myself and decided to drop teaching for a year.

Then I got an email two weeks ago inviting me to go back. I was actually still in Paris when I saw the email, and couldn't contain my excitement when I told my husband about it and asked if it was okay to accept (I had to clear it with him because, you know, he's my driver! Hahahaha!) Luckily, I have a very supportive husband who said GO AHEAD as soon as I finished asking my question :P

The difference with this coming semester though is that they moved my class from being a 4th year class to a 3rd year class, replacing (I think) Marketing Management. They want my class to be a big-picture look at IMC and serve as a foundational course. This is VASTLY different from how I designed the course in the last 2 years I taught it, where it assumed the students already knew the basics and that I could throw out terms like segmentation and positioning without having to explain what they meant. Changing gears to being a basic, foundational course means I need to adjust almost 90% of the content, because this time my class would be what the 4th-year teachers will expect to have taught the kids the basics. :s

So now, I'm mulling over how to revamp my course content, syllabus, and lecture presentations (oh and the assignments and class presentations too!) to fill this new objective. Nooninooninoo.... Time to research again! :P

Anyway, apart from this slight inconvenience (plus, I really think my previous course content was really cool!), I must say I'm very excited. Teaching is such a source of fulfillment for me, and it's a great way to stay motivated with this professional field I chose, when work gets to be too much or I get too bogged down by office politics. It's a nice way to remind myself of why I love this profession. It also serves as a great way to make repayments for all the blessings I have. Lastly, it's also a venue to learn (or in some cases re-learn) the basics - which are far too easy to forget once you're too heavily into the thick of things)

Can't wait for June 18!

Trip of the Year!

We're back!!! From the vacation of the year!!! :D

I loved loved loved loved our trip. It was a glorious set of 10 vacation days, to the most romantic cities in Europe. Some highlights:

ON PARIS
1. We loved our hotel and the staff. They were so friendly and accomodating, and they made sure our stay was comfortable. We were upgraded to the biggest room and had easy access to the MRT.

2. We took the Hop On Hop Off bus tour, which allowed us to see the whole of Paris, with just 1 ticket. My most favorite site is the Eiffel Tower whereas Dennis really liked NotreDame Cathedral.

3. We loved the food, esp in our favorite restaurant George V. We loved escargot SOOOOO very much!

4. Speaking of food, our lunch with Miss Lunch was the best meal we had in our trip. It cost 55 euros per person, which may sound pricey, but no, it was sooo worth it! All the courses were top-notch, and she served 3 kinds of wines! We were also lucky to have such pleasant and fun company throughout the dinner. They were all so nice, and the conversation was lively enough that we were able to fight off jetlag (we ate there on the same day we arrived). It was such a great experience. Everybody going to Paris should try to get seats on Miss Lunch's table. She only does it every 2 month or so, so if your schedule jives with her, GO FOR IT! Don't even think about it anymore :)

5. We had an encounter with several suspicious-looking Shanghainese women, who asked us to buy LV bags and wallets on their behalf, even giving us the cash upfront. We tried to help them by going to the boutique and asking for the items they requested. But since the LV salesgirl refused to sell me anything w/o me giving over my passport, I drew the line there and just walked out. Told our Shanghainese auntie that we didn't bring our passports (which wasn't true, they were with Dennis) but I just didn't want to expose our official documents to a situation that might get us in trouble. Better safe than sorry. My gut told me it was the right thing to do.

6. We loved Chateau de Versailles. It was beautiful!!! But, our tour guide/driver was such a character! He was soooo funny, in a what-an-ass-but-he's-kinda-funny sort of way. Hehehe. Ask me more kwento about him to get more details. Dennis & I always share a huge laugh whenever we remember him.

7. We didn't get to see the Eiffel Tower at night, and we also missed our Da Vinci Code tour because we woke up too late (hehehe). It's not so bad though. As Dennis said, it gives us another reason to go back to Paris.

ON ROME
1. It was such a picturesque city, and the Fontana di Trevi was my absolute favorite site! Which was made even better by the fact that our room / B&B was around the corner from the fountain! LOVE IT!

2. Speaking of our room, it was so big and so conveniently located, it's the best spot in Rome, in my opinion. At a very reasonable rate too, considering it includes breakfast. The hosts are also sooooo friendly and made things so comfortable for us. I loved it! They even gave us champagne because I told them we were on our honeymoon, which is sort of true :)

3. The Vatican was an impressive site. HANDS DOWN. Even if I'm not Catholic, knowing the history behind the place and what the various spots symbolized, I was sooo impressed. There was even a Holy Week mass going on when we were inside St Peter Basilica, but since it was in Italian, we opted out and gave our slots to someone else.

4. Our Vatican Museum tour was the best! That was my favorite tour. We loved it so much we bought the book! :)

5. Dennis bought me red roses when we were along the Spanish Steps. A really simple gesture, but I really loved it.

6. We went to both fancy restaurants and really simple trattorias when we were in Rome. And guess what, we actually preferred the food at the cheaper places! Goes to show you don't have to spend big to get good food :)

We also shopped (mostly for other people) and dined to our hearts' content. I loved the trip also because it was such a nice set of bonding days. It was a good break from our everyday routine. While we would still get to talk everyday, there's a different sense of closeness when you travel together and really "be" together all day every day. I can't explain it. It made us decide to go on a long trip every year. Somewhere new, but doesn't have to be very far (i.e. Europe). Even when we have kids, we can still jet off to Korea, China, or even Australia, for a few days each year, to have that 1-on-1 time that's simply irreplaceable.

I'm so thankful the trip went beyond my expectations. After planning it for so long, I'm so happy that it turned out even better than I expected. For a while, I worried that I may have hyped it too much in my head. But thank God, no, the reality was even better. A classic moment of this was when I first saw the Eiffel Tower and the Fontana di Trevi. I had to stop because they just both blew my mind. I knew they were good sites to see, but when they were actually presented right in front of me, I stood there breathless and completely in awe.

I want this experience every year. If only for that reason, I'll continue on this corporate rat race, if only so we'll raise enough funds to go on this adventure once a year :)

TODAY!

Today is when we leave for our trip! We're going first to Malaysia, and stay for a night coz our flight to Paris is from KL and leaves really late tomorrow. So I figured since it's Atty's first time in Malaysia, might as well leave a whole day to explore it :) Then after that, we're off to Paris and Rome! :)

I was so excited yesterday that I slept past 1am already (really late for a weeknight, for me). My adrenaline was so high after packing and my head kept swirling with possible items I may have left out. Then today, I'll have lunch with the girls, then will go home to finish packing.. then it's off to the airport! :D

Will update again when I get back. Bye! :)

It's here, it's here!!!

Our trip is finally here!!!! 3 days from now, that is.... I can't wait to start packing our bags this evening, which leaves me enough time to buy toiletries and other missing items either tomorrow or Thursday.

We leave the condo at around 6pm on Friday, for our 9pm flight to KL. I'm so excited!!!! :D

A small setback though is I seem to be developing some sort of skin allergy or eczema... I'm getting it checked by the derma tomorrow to see what cream I can put. I also took antihistamines the other night, thinking it's a food or season related allergy. Usually this does the trick, but this time around, for some reason, the small, red, itchy blots are still there! And what's even more annoying is the skin around my eyes also seems to have them :( Boohoo.

OK, enough complaining. I'm going to Europe on Friday!!!! :D

1 week to go!!!

Until our Europe trip!!!!!!!

After months of planning, it all boils down to these last 7 days. I have to print out our tickets, hotel vouchers, tour coupons and itinerary. Admittedly, I slacked off a bit with the planning, especially on finishing the Rome travel book that my husband gave me. But it's okay, I have this weekend to do those things :)

I AM SO EXCITED!!!!! :D

Time Frame

Some conversation topics today got me thinking about time frames. Just when you think you're in charge of your life's major milestones and the time frames on which they will happen, you get an awakening (rude or pleasant, depending on the situation) that the otherwise is what's true. A number of women I know have such trouble conceiving, to the point of desperation (i.e. IVF and other scientific ways of making a baby) that I can't help but think life is really out of our hands. We can try to schedule our life and put time frames that are convenient and/or feasible for us, but God will have His own plans and His own schedule for you. No matter how much you fight it, or want it to be different, you can't.

:s

The thing with being in front of a computer all day...

is you find things online that you didn't know you wanted!!!

housegirl saga continuation...

OK, so there's more update now with my housegirl situation. The in-laws of my housegirl did not allow for their probinsiyana daughter to come to Manila, mostly because it means her education will drag out longer than necessary. Completely understable, but still an inconvenient truth...

Anyway, another option has surfaced. What if we allow her to bring her son with her and stay with us from Monday to Friday (or sometimes Saturday morning)? Let's break that down into a list of pros and cons -

PROS
- She's very trustworthy; as in, I can trust her with money, jewelry, food, and basically everything and anything in my small household. And if you employ someone to be in your house by her lonesome all day long, you better have trust as the number 1 requirement.
- She's willing to be alone in the condo (or in this case, be with her son alone in the condo). Not a lot of maids are willing to do that, apparently, and I learned this yesterday from a coworker. I don't know why I didn't think of it before, but it is quite a challenge to be alone all day, everyday, save for a few minutes of interaction with me and Dennis at the start and end of each day. It takes a certain kind of personality to be able to thrive in a situation like that, and this lovely housegirl of mine is one such personality. She is content and quite used to being alone, with no one to talk to (at least no one of adult age). It's another value she brings to the table.
- She cooks really well. In Dennis' words, she's the best cook he's ever had.
- She can be relied on to do a good job with the cleaning and washing.
- She's been with my family for ages, and because of that, I can entrust her to be my eyes and ears, when later on when we have a baby and I have to employ a yaya I may not know personally (I have to be realistic), I can count on her to look out for my family's best interest and make sure the yaya toes the line. I don't know how else to explain it but she's very good for my peace of mind.

CONS
- The son will be in our care, and will be our responsibility. While I'm sure she won't allow any harm to fall onto her son, if the kid gets sick, he is our responsibility. One way to mitigate this con is immunization, and I plan to check on what the kid has gotten (and has not gotten) so far in terms of vaccine. If needed, I'll pay for the additional vaccines, if only to make sure he doesn't fall seriously ill when in our household.
- Her attention might be split, hence it may take her longer to do her work. For now, at least, this isn't a big issue, since she's free most of the time, given the small amount of work needed to maintain our 124 sqm condo. She's mostly done with her work by 1:30 or 2pm in the afternoon, and she can afford to watch tv or take a nap for an hour or two, before starting dinner prep at around 4:30.
- The son is 2 years old, and as my officemates call it, still at the terrible age of being loud, rambunctious and very capable of breaking things in the condo. While I doubt the high incidence of this, it's nothing that a bit of childproofing can't do. Also, my mother in law has had experience of help bringing in their children to live in their property. From her (and Dennis') observation, their kids are not like the kids of the owners of the house. Their kids tend to know their place and be more behaved. I don't have firsthand experience with this so I really wouldn't know. This is the one "con" that I really don't have a hard solution for, so I guess we can just figure this out as we go along. For instance, if you've seen my place, you can close the kitchen swing door and keep the kid on the other side of the condo - the kitchen/ maid's quarter's area, which is farthest from our room. Thereby minimizing the noise level...

So there. That pretty much sums up the situation. Dennis says, after considering everything, he's willing to offer a trial period and see how it pans out. Hopefully the situation ends up win-win for both parties. I can tell she doesn't want to quit her job as much as possible. I know the extra income comes in handy for her small family; plus, if we do allow her to bring her child along, it's the same income level for her, for less expense. We do want to keep her as much as possible too, given the list of pros above. So I hope this situation does work out and we don't regret it.

For now, at least, I think this is our best alternative. Keep your fingers crossed everything goes smoothly!

housegirl problem

On top of the emotional rollercoaster caused by my grandma's condition, I have another problem looming in the horizon. My housegirl, whom Dennis & I trust completely and can cook to Atty's tummy's content, is again faced with the possibility of terminating her employment. As I said in my November 2010 post about her, she and her husband are going home in April for their son's first birthday. She told me that they've decided they do not want their son growing up away from them and that they will bring him back to Manila when they come home from the province in that April trip. Now the question is, who will take care of their son when his mom is with us from Monday to Friday every week. The plausible solution lies in the husband's younger sister, who is a 19-year-old girl still in 3rd year high school. There's an OHP program by the Deped that offers weekend classes for working students, and there's a handful of public schools that offer this program. Aha! A ray of hope! The solution can be that this girl comes to Manila with them in April and looks after the little boy JM from Monday to Friday, then on weekends, she goes to school while my housegirl takes over her rightful duties as a mom.

It's not a perfect option, though. Firstly, it assumes that the husband's parents will allow their 19-year-old probinsiyana daughter to come to Manila. Another assumption is that the OHP program of the school will accept the student (apparently, there's a huge demand for this and you need to present strong justification why you should be given a slot). Another is that the arrangement needs to work out, meaning the girl adjusts well and is able to handle the mom's duties from Mon to Fri, including keeping house.

But at least it's an option. She was visibly torn as she told me about the situation. She clearly doesn't want to leave us, partly because she needs the job but mostly because she has come to care for me and Dennis a lot. Plus she really loves my family, so she doesn't want to let us down as much as possible. However, she really doesn't want to be away from her son much longer, which I also understand.

Hay. Dennis is trying his best to find out more about the program, so we can present a good case to the husband's parents when they go home in April. But even assuming best-laid plans, if one of the factors above falls through, we'll have to face a housegirl-less situation. And my personal stand on hiring househelp is that if I can't trust the person 100%, I'd rather not hire her at all. :s

Help?

K&Co Love

Lately, I've been buying so many K&CO dresses - the jersey ones that are so light and soft to wear! I love them soooo much! And I was so happy to find some on sale last night - roughly P1000 to P1200 each! What a deal!

At the back of my mind, I also can't help but wonder if I'm doing this in preparation for the next stage in my life, where loose, comfy dresses would be a daily uniform rather than an occasional treat. Granted, I've been feeling so comfortable in dresses that jeans and slacks suddenly feel constricting. But I also wonder if this is my way of prepping myself for pregnancy. Everyone who knows me knows that I like to plan, and plan ahead at that, so maybe it's not such a far-fetched idea. :P

Just wanted to share that. This is an I LOVE K&CO post :)

5 weeks to go...

before we leave for Europe!!! Yehey!!! :D

silver-related post

It may sound really cheesy but I still get so kilig whenever I come home to my husband or he comes home to me, depending on who's home first. I love making discoveries about him, no matter how small, like how he chooses what to wear in the morning or how he likes his coffee made. I love waking up next to him and have little top-of-the-morning chats... or late-night, don't-go-to-sleep-yet-talk-to-me-first conversations about anything or everything. I love our little debates over what to watch on tv or our little fantasy-filled discussions about the future. I love being with him, all the time- and whenever we part, I look forward to when I'm seeing him next, even if it's just 6 or 10 hours later.

I don't know if this is just all part of the honeymoon stage, but I soooo wish it will never end. I had some recent run-ins with people carrying marriage problems on their shoulders and wonder if they ever had these little honeymoon-stage moments of glee. And if they did, did these moments just stop, or is it due to the stress of marriage's everyday hassles or the seemingly inevitable distance created when children come along? What possibly happened to take them from where Dennis and I are now to a co-habitation filled with errands, issues and problems?

Sometimes I think marriage is like a sterling silver bracelet from Tiffany's (which incidentally was Dennis' surprise gift for me). Sterling silver may dull after some time, and this is due to everyday wear. Inevitably, dirt or libag (hehe) or residue from sweat, perfume, pollution, etc envelop the silver, causing it to dull and lose its shine. But all it needs to go back to its original pristine state is the alertness and attention you pay to it - to realize when the wear is already affecting its brilliance and shine - and the discipline (and sometimes humility) to make the effort to polish the silver, to make the true shine come out. Obviously, if you never take the time to pay attention and make the effort, there will come a time when you realize you're just wearing a piece of dirt-ridden and libag-heavy metal on your wrist, and you can no longer see the beauty of what once made your heart go pitter-patter.

May this blog post serve as a reminder to me to always remember to take the time out to "polish our silver". It's okay to deal with life's everyday problems - someone's got to- and it's okay to prioritize your children on an ongoing basis, because they need you more. But make the effort to "do the polish".. and do it often. As with cleaning anything in the house, the more regularly you do it, the easier it is to wipe off the grime :)