Embryologist Consult

So we went to see the embryologist and Dr Mendiola today to find out the status of our embryos. Recall that last June 11, I had my egg retrieval procedure which resulted in the ff:
> 2 mature eggs
> 1 semi-mature (called M1) egg
> and, 2 immature eggs that will be subjected to IVM or in vitro maturation, which hopefully results in their upgrading to mature grade

So after 9 days, here are the results:
> Mature Egg 1 was able to be grown into a Day-2 embryo by June 13 and was frozen as the backup embryo to be transferred if all else fails (scary phrase)
> Mature Egg 2 grew to Day 5 but degenerated by the time Day 6 rolled around
> Semi-mature M1 egg grew but very slowly... only 2 cells by Day 2 and compaction-stage by Day 5, whereas normally, embryos should reach blastocyst stage by this time. It finally reached blastocyst stage by Day 7 (two additional days after the average), and was frozen. This will be our priority contender come transfer time.
> The 2 immature eggs did not make it to maturation.

So we have 2 embryos - a blastocyst and a Day-2-er. Funny, I even gave the 'transfer one or two' thing quite a deep think; yet, it turns out I don't even have that as a choice. We'll transfer the blastocyst first, it being the higher-odds of the two, when I'm ready for the transfer. Day-2-er will be the backup for a future cycle.

Dr Mendiola was very patient with our questions and also assured me that the embryos can stay frozen until my immunologist clears me of the auto-immune issues I have. He has heard of LIT therapy and agreed that it's better to get them done and cleared before going for a transfer.

I'm a bit bummed, to be honest, that we only have 1 of each type. I honestly thought one of the immature eggs would catch up, and then hopefully we have 2 or even 3 blastocysts. I guess I'm just an overachiever by nature and by heart and I guess I expected a lot from my embryos as well. Or maybe a part of me felt that I wanted at least a part of this process to be 'perfect', even if the others aren't. I dunno. Dennis is more optimistic than I'm feeling right now.

Ironically, it's the semi-mature egg that made it to blastocyst stage, and the mature one fizzled out right before it reached it. Funny how nature works. This also gave me an idea of what may have happened during our first IVF round -- maybe that embryo is similar to Mature Egg 2... They're both perfect contenders on Day 2 (IVF round 1 embryo was a Day 2 transfer, if you recall) but didn't result into anything at the end.

Funny.

In an unfunny way.

Oh well.

So tomorrow, we're doing our first LIT treatment. I found this provider based in Katipunan that does home service of the husband blood draw, which saves us the trouble of trekking up to Katips at the crack of dawn (FYI, LIT sessions always involve an early-morning blood draw from the husband because it takes about 4 hours to process the blood to isolate only the lymphocytes, before it is ready to be injected into the wife's... forearm! I don't know why they particularly chose the forearm, as it sounds like a painful transfusion site to me... Anyway...) So they'll arrive at our condo at 6am, get Dennis' blood out into 5-6 vials, and then we're supposed to go to their clinic by around 10:30 or so for me to get the lymphocyte transfusion. Then we'll see how my body reacts to it. From my understanding, the more violent the reaction (i.e rashes, boils-looking angry red inflammations, etc), the better. It is supposed to mean that my body is 'reading' Dennis' genetic material and a 'battle' is being waged, hence starting the assimilation process. The objective is for my immune system to read, recognize and accept Dennis' genetic material as non-threats. Very sci-fi, right?

On my way back to the office earlier from Kato, I couldn't help but cry as I talked to our future child in my thought-voice (of course, I was being chauffeured back, so it was just thoughts running through my idle, in-transit head), telling him or her that, see, this is how much mommy and daddy love you. This is how much we are fighting for you -- that we fight even for your conception to happen, for your implantation to happen, for YOU to happen. It's not meant to be compared to people blessed with natural pregnancies. It was just an expression of the magnitude of sacrifice that we're doing --- a level of sacrifice that sometimes overwhelms me beyond comprehension. We love you, advocate for you and fight for you, even when you are simply an idea, a dream, a hope in the hopefully-not-distant future. We sacrifice so much, to the point that we even 'play' with our health, just to have even the smallest chance of YOU happening. Love. That's all this is all about.

Love.

When you do come around, and I believe in my bones that you will (and you're just choosing when to make your grand entrance), boy, will you be the most loved and cherished child that ever graced this world. If I can bottle up all my hopes and dreams for you, all my fears and doubts, all my pain and endurance, I would, if it can remind you everyday just how WANTED you are.

I love you already.