peg for our bedroom

Love it! :)

Project Home checkpoint

So far, here's what's been accomplished in Project Home:
1. All old tiling and fixtures have been taken out. New tiles are currently being put in as we speak, and the new bathroom fixtures have already been delivered.
2. Paint has been approved (by me) as of today. They made special mixes for me, to get the tones that I want. The paint in the guest room turned out lighter than I thought, but I figured it's better to have something lighter (or weaker in color) than the opposite where you almost get heart failure for walking into a room too bright for your tastes.

Good progress for the past 6 days they've worked on the condo. Up next are finalizing the shower enclosure and shampoo caddy in the bathrooms, starting the waterproofing and starting the electrical work. Also, we have to buy new pinlights, door handles and blinds.

I'm bleeding money, but my heart is giddy with excitement and fulfillment. They're right. Buying your own place is bittersweet. While your wallet aches to no end and your budgeting skills are challenged almost on a daily basis, the feeling of achievement definitely cannot be overestimated. :)

118!

My friend Anna got hitched last Saturday, and up until then, her impending wedding has overshadowed the fact that mine is just around the corner as well. But now that her wedding is over, I have just realized that it's my turn next! 118 days until my wedding!!!! Aaaaak!!!!

leave of absence

So, I won't be posting any MBA updates for a while because I'm taking a leave of absence from my schoolwork. Reasons are:
(1) For this upcoming school year, my wedding date falls in the middle of the 1st and 2nd terms. Which means that when the finals week of 1st term rolls in, I'll be in the home stretch of my wedding planning. Then when 2nd term comes in, I'll be out for 2 weeks on my honeymoon. So I figure, might as well take a break from school and focus on my wedding, my honeymoon and getting ready for married life.
(2) Work is getting heavier, and I admit I am still adjusting to this new work scope. I know that the respite from MBA will do me some good too in this area. Also, my new work entails some going-out-of-town on provincial tours and events, so it would be good not to have school to worry about for a while.

Also, I figure when I live so near to RCBC, I can resume school w/o any difficulty. My mom is worried I may not go back after the wedding and honeymoon, because a lot of people lose that crucial sense of momentum and inertia when they take a break from school. Most don't go back. Esp when pregnancy rolls in.

I told her that, first off, given my personality, I think I would be the first to give myself a hard tiime to leave unfinished something as big and as important to me as this. Also, I am just 4 terms away from finishing my MBA. Which means a pregnancy will not likely affect my finishing. And lastly, Dennis promised her (my mom) that he will make sure I finish school, even if it means carrying me physically into class (haha!) So yes, I hope there are enough measures in place to prevent me from permanently slacking off from schoolwork.

There you go. No books, exams, readings or class presentations for 7 months. Hope I miss it so I'll be in 100% "ganado" to resume school in Jan :)

Til then, books! :)

Project Home underway!

By next Tuesday, the condo renovation crew will move in and start the work on the tiling and bathroom fixtures. Then after that, they'll move on to the kitchen and parquet floors. The aircon will then be installed, then the sanding and relamination work will follow. The electrical work will then ensue, followed by the waterproofing and painting. Hopefully, by end-June, the place will be ready for furniture and appliances to be moved in. I can't wait!!!!! :)

a not-so-new tomorrow

I must admit I am saddened by the results of the 2010 elections. While it's good that the automated process worked, despite the many glitches and problems, and that the results seem to be clean and uncontestible, I am saddened by the confirmation that the Filipino electorate is still mostly very immature. It's politically immature thinking that led the majority of the populace to believe that a good father sires a good son, and if someone pledges to be incorruptible, that alone makes him a good President. I'm also sad that Filipinos opted for Erap as a second choice. Again, very politically immature. I honestly don't know how we can progress from this point. This has *got* to be a new low. Even for the Philippines. The change we all want is still an elusive dream.

But then, if I really believe in Gibo and have faith on the ideals he was pushing, I need to set these "nega vibes" aside and still wish the new administration the best. Perhaps we will be given a miracle; after all, no matter what we get into, we as a nation always survive. We may not always emerge better or wiser, but we always live to see another day (or another administration). Knock on wood, hopefully, Homer's parents will indeed bless him from up above and guide him throughout his 6 years in power. And hopefully, his youngest sister does shut up for good, pack up her things and move away just as she promised she would.

And maybe, just maybe, we'll see the day when our nation will finally elect officials based on merit, on qualifications and on track record. If not, we may one day elect Baby James because of his grandparents. If that happens, I may just push Atty to run for mayor. Or President. Haha!

There's still hope, people. Let's all pray for a better tomorrow for all of us. Even if it has to be achieved in spite of our newly elected leader.

Mabuhay ang Pilipino!

May 10, 2010

Made my vote count today, despite almost 3 hours of waiting and falling in line, after a failed attempt earlier this morning at 7am. Thank God I was able to successfully feed my ballot into the machine. Now all we gotta do is wait.

Win or lose, GT, you should be president.

Brand Camp

I got sent to the first PANA Brand Camp, along with another colleague from SMART last Thursday-Saturday (yesterday, actually). Just want to jot down some thoughts I had during the 3-day competition, which incidentally ended with us bagging 2nd place, despite us not even putting in 100% effort (as in, cruising lang talaga and eating the free food) and sleeping early the night before the actual competition. Anyway, some thoughts:
1. Ran into a former classmate, who was also a delegate to the Brand Camp. Funny because some things don't change (he's still a pompous, irritating ass, just like before) yet some things can still change, believe it or not (he's actually a worse ass than before, because he has upped the ante on ass-ness).
2. Some people are so intense. They're so competitive (even at this age ah!) to the point of not talking to other delegates, not sleeping (or only sleeping 2 hours) before the competition, and (horror of horrors!) not eating due to "nervousness". C'mon, guys, this is NOT a matter of life and death, and it is DEFINITELY not a reflection of how far you've gone in your career or how far you can possibly go in the future. True, it would be GREAT to get to go to Cannes to compete and represent the Phils (which was the top prize), but you guys have got to learn how to CHILL. Otherwise, you'll get wrinkles at an early age or, worse, develop some awful heart disease. Plus, you have to learn that there is a healthy way to compete, and the way you're doing it is totally wrong.
3. Strange how FMCG guys can "look down" on telco marketing guys, thinking that telco guys don't do "real marketing". Funny, because the 1st and 2nd placers in the competition are both from telco teams. Only the 3rd team came from FMCG, and the 8 non-placers are all from FMCGs. Hehe. One word: Karma.
4. It's nice to get away, even for a few days, and even just to Tagaytay. Mental note to do this with Dennis when we're married already. A small, short getaway can do wonders to your mental well-being.

That's pretty much it. Am I sad we didn't place 1st? Really, no. Again, it would be nice to get to go to Cannes, just for the experience. But in any case, we can't go even if we did win 1st place, because my partner is currently 5 months preggers and will not be able to travel in June. I'm perfectly happy too with 2nd place, because I seriously did not put in that much effort. We even watched the evening teleseryes and took our time with the shower-and-get-ready-for-bed routines. We had relaxed meals, took our leisurely pace and didn't even really listen to the speakers who were "training" us. I just really took it as a small vacation. When it came to the presentation, we did have to cram our thoughts into 8 slides (to be presented in 5 minutes) and kinda struggled with Keynote (the only "accredited" presentation software in Cannes) but that was pretty much it. I also do not take it as any sort of validation of my "marketing cred", because I don't think any one convention or competition can do that. It's reality that tells you how well you've performed or how much farther you can still go. This competition is just really a recruitment process for a team that will compete in France. That's all. Some people need to learn to relax.

I was also thinking back at my college days and when we first learned how to live with "competition". I'm glad to be looking back at those days and see how I've grown with regard to how I treat competition and how I've learned when to draw the line and distance myself from my work. Don't get me wrong, I'm still as driven as when I was 18 years old and learning how to write ad briefs and make marketing presentations. I'm still as ambitious, in that I still want to push forth with my career and work towards being an even better marketing professional. But I guess I've learned (and still learning) to strike a balance between work and life. And see work for what it truly is- work. Not "just work" because I don't mean to trivialize work. It serves a purpose in life and deserves its proper attention, dedication and energy. But it's not what consumes us or represents what we are. It's just what we do. :)

BTW, in unrelated news, today marks the 1-year anniversary of when Dennis asked me to marry him. :) I'm not sure if it's even a valid or real occasion to celebrate, but it's nice nonetheless. Not everyone has a year (and more) to go from engagement to wedding, and I think it's nice that we get to have that. Even just for one year. (God knows I have NO desires of stretching it out further. I'm happy to have had the time.)

:)

May 10th

It's not my intention to make this a political blog. I just realized that this 2010 elections is probably my first time to feel this strongly about a candidate, believe in him so much and want him to win so badly I'm thinking of ways on how I can volunteer for him without compromising my safety or my schedule. Whenever I listen to Gibo, I am in awe of his vision for the Philippines and inspired by the clean, honest and respectful campaign he has run to date. I am not surprised at all at his 90% conversion rate- meaning, when people listen to him in any forum, they are convinced 90% of the time that he is the best man for the job. And truly, if you are open-minded and you give him the opportunity to tell you what he has planned, you will be just as convinced as me that he is the best option we have. I think he will represent us very well internationally, and he has a plan on how to move this country forward. He also oozes with sincerity whenever he speaks and I think it's commendable that he has mounted this campaign WITHOUT mudslinging, digging up dirt about opponents or talking badly about them. He keeps positivity at the heart of his campaign and as such, he has garnered the support of the youth. It's also worth considering that not one of his opponents have anything bad to say about him. In the way that Phil politics goes in this country, that is a feat in itself.

I wish soooo badly that he wins on May 10th. To the point that I pray to God that He helps Gibo win. I want this country to be better, to be safer, to be richer and to be stronger for my and everyone else's sakes, including my future kids. Let's vote green! :)

5 years na!

By next Wednesday, Atty and I would have been together for 5 years already. This will also be our last boyfriend-girlfriend anniversary, and that makes me feel a bit sentimental. I remember when we first started going out, the little discoveries we made of each other and the little adjustments that we had to make to make space for each other in our (already quite full) lives. I remember the days when we just met each other, our long talks that go late into the night, our first dates, the first time he met my family, the first time I met his and the first time we went to the temple together. I'm getting a bit wistful going through memory lane, thinking of the journey we've had and how everything has brought us to this point in time, 5 months from getting married and moving into our first home. I'm so grateful I met him. Life certainly became a whole lot more worth living :)

this week...

was one of the most tiring weeks of my life. Emotionally tiring, that is. I hate politics.

the big picture

You can't always get what you want, but if you try, sometimes you find, you get what you need :)

The past few days have really been a growing-up period for me. First off, I had to adjust with the revelation at work that meant I had to get out of my comfort zone and dive in head-first into an unknown area of business and try to perform as well as I possibly can. All this while juggling my other considerations and leaving behind the team that I love so dearly.

Then yesterday was a day of reckoning in terms of my personal life, specifically our expenses and how our financial outlook as a couple will be in the next few years. I crunched some numbers and had the sinking realization that I could either get the honeymoon of my dreams or keep significant cushion money (aka buffer money) for our little nest egg to grow, given that the expenses we'll have when we get married practically equal what we bring home on a net basis. I knew I had a choice-- either I push for the honeymoon I want but pay for the price of uncertainty because that amount of money could've been our safety net... or I could postpone this dream of a trip and relish the security of knowing that I have some stash of money hidden away for a rainy day. I had to weigh my options and to be honest, at the core of me, I knew what the right thing to do was. It's the bratty side of me that was adamant on being able to go where we intended to go, but the mature me already knew what I had to do. Also, when I talked to Dennis, I was also given some discoveries, such as the fact that he had actually not minded where we go for our honeymoon, it doesn't have to be NYC. He just wanted to celebrate being married to me, and he only wanted to go to NYC because he knew how much I wanted it. Even if it meant forcing the issue financially, he would do it because he knew I wanted it and he already felt like I made so many compromises by agreeing to marry him (which, for the record, is sooo untrue). He said he understands our predicament but would support me in any choice I make.

I felt so bad that I had kept my eyes solely on the goal of going to NY that I had totally forgotten about the big picture. That we are in this to build a life together, not just a measly 7 or 8 days abroad. And I realized that the dream already is right in front of me, which is the dream of building a life together with the man I love and putting up a home to house that love. Everything else is a bonus, an optional thing, gravy or the cherry on top. I already have everything I need when I have this man who's willing to do anything he can to make me happy.

So without even waiting for him to ask me again, I've decided to forego the original plans and go for our Plan B, which, I must remind myself, is not that bad and is in fact pretty cool. We've decided to go to Japan instead, and this may actually end up being as good an option as NY, because not only will we be able to indulge in our favorite food (after Chinese, of course), we'll still be able to go to a cold place (which is what Dennis loves) and we will actually be going to a place that neither of us have ever been to. The downside of our original plan of Sing + NY was that both places are not new to me. With this new plan, we get the best of both worlds- Singapore is the place mired with personal history for me, yet we also share the experience of first-time travel in Japan. I don't at all feel shortchanged that the original plans won't push through. I have to admit, I spent the better half of yesterday and today feeling like I lost a dream, but now that I've allowed reality (and maturity) to sink in, I actually feel really good about this decision. This whole thing may turn out to be a blessing through and through after all. I not only feel better because I'm being more responsible, I am actually starting to get excited :) Which is what any honeymoon should be about anyway.

So yeah, this brings me back to the first sentence that starts this post. In the process of not getting what you (originally) wanted, you may just find that you instead just got what you really really needed. And at the end of the day, you find that what you've been reaching so far out for has always been within your reach. Right by your side.

:)

change is good? always?

A new change is upon me. Just when I thought I had enough on my plate, I now have to adjust to a TOTALLY new job effective April 15. I honestly feel torn over my reaction. On the "happy" side lies the opportunity for learning and the chance for professional growth. On the "unhappy" side lies the following:
- The new job is TOTALLY out of my comfort zone, i.e. I may not like it.
- The new job may entail A LOT of local travel, for which I'm not excited. It also can potentially be unfriendly towards my MBA schedule. Not to mention my bridal errand schedule.
- I am required to leave behind my team- composed of people who are not only dependable and loyal but who have become very good friends of mine over the years. This physically pains me, as in I feel a sharp ache in my heart when I think of the prospect of leaving them behind.

I've heard that change is good more times than I care to count, but sometimes I'm not too sure it's always applicable. I'm not sure if change for the sake of change can still be good, because I fail to see how having no rhyme or reason over a certain change can bring about any kind of (deliberately planned) good. It may accidentally become beneficial in the end, but would it be responsible to leave such a consequence to mere chance?

Ohwell. It's not like I have a choice in the matter. The alternative (i.e. protesting against the change or fighting for the status quo) will only make me look immature, not to mention unprofessional. So I just have to suck this up and HOPE that it goes well in the end.

i think i found my wedding shoes!

*just us*

I have a confession to make. These days, the wedding doesn't excite me very much. At least not in the way people would normally expect it to excite a bride-to-be. I don't know if it's because it involves so much stressful discussions, like what color does my MIL want for her dress or whether the cake we're eyeing is worth the cost or when the suits of the male entourage must get done. It may also be because I feel like the wedding is a (happy) occasion that we have no choice but to share with others. Don't get me wrong; I do not feel forced to share our big day with others. It's just that I'm taking it as a matter of fact (and a matter of life) that it's not just the 2 of us who're invested in the wedding. Our parents top the list of "other people who care about the wedding", followed by close family members and friends. And I don't mind that at all. I really don't. I love the fact that there are a lot of people who can't wait til our wedding. It would be really sad if otherwise. But, I can't help but feel then that the wedding is not "just ours", and to be honest, these days, the details about the wedding don't get a "woohoo" out of me as they would normally do.

What does get me excited though is the honeymoon. Imagining us on going to Singapore for the first phase of our honeymoon gets me excited like you wouldn't believe. Dreaming (and hoping against hope) that we get ourselves to NYC shortly thereafter gets me even more excited! So excited I could jump out of my bones in joy! Apart from the honeymoon, I can't help but find myself planning future trips together- I imagined going to Macau for Valentine's weekend next year or maybe even Japan for Holy Week 2011, if we can afford to. I guess it's also partly because up until we're married, Dennis and I haven't been anywhere (far) together, much less abroad. The farthest we've been to together is Tagaytay, and that was just a day trip. Because of our culture and the conservatism it espouses, we've really had overnight trips anywhere, so I guess this also contributes to my enthusiasm that, after Sept 19 this year, we can go anywhere we want to together :) The freedom and the opportunities it offers just can't help but get me really riled up! I can't wait!

Another reason is, because of how certain things panned out in Dennis' life so far, he hasn't really been to many places. In fact, when it comes to going abroad, he's only been to Taiwan and the States, and these trips happened when he was a little boy. He's never been to Singapore or even HK, much less other places I've been to like Canada, the Middle East, Australia, Hawaii or even China or Malaysia. Part of me feels really bad for him, because it seems unfair for him not to have had those experiences I've been fortunate enough to have. I know he doesn't agree, because those hard times in his past fortified him and made him every bit of the great guy he is now. I know those times were instrumental in making him the responsible, strong and grounded person I love so very much, and I'm very grateful. But all that doesn't change the part of me that wants to let him in on those travel opportunities I've had. I want him to see why travel is such a passion for me, how travel can change perspectives and mindsets, and what travel does to a person. I want us to jumpstart our marriage with adventures and discoveries- kickoff our union brimming full of experiences and rich memories. It's not about luxury, that's the least of my concerns, nor is it about indulgences. Far from it. I want to infuse travel into the early part of our marriage, because I know it'll be good for us. It'll be a great foot to start our life off on. I know it'll only be "just us" for a short while, before concerns about baby formula or playschool fill our conversations. So I'll know we'll be grateful to have had a good run at "just us", when we could :)

I don't know where all that outpouring of thoughts came from. I just updated our travel itinerary to Singapore (actually, I just bought us reserved seats), and got to surfing through the rest of Cebu Pac's website. And I got to thinking about this picture in my head of us having the adventure of a lifetime.

I love him. So very much. And I can't count down the days enough until "just us" starts :)

the happy decision

Reminder to self: Happiness is a choice- a decision- and has less to do with circumstances but more to do about your attitude towards circumstances.

MBA updates

OK, I'm wrapping up my 7th term as an MBA student (wow, has it been that long???) and just enrolled into my 8th term (FYI- after the 8th, there are 3 more to go until graduation! CAN THIS BE OVER ALREADY, PLEASE!). While it seems like time stood still for the longest time because of my seemingly unending MBA journey, the rest of my life seems to be going by in record time. Before I knew it, I'm about to enter the 5-month mark until our Mr-and-Mrs Day, and in about a month's time, we would've been engaged for a year already! How fast! Also, in a month or two, our condo would've been renovated already and it's time to bring in the furniture. Again, how fast! Next thing I know, it's my FILC bridal shower, then it's September (which is also budget season in Smart) and then the big day is here!

Anyway, this update is supposed to be about my MBA. Sometimes, I really have doubts on why I'm on this particular uphill battle, when it's completely optional. In fact, an overwhelming majority of my friends and colleagues do not carry MBA degrees, so there are days when I question myself and ask why the hell am I subjecting myself to this kind of torture. Why would I want to stay up some nights and study or read or write papers, when I could be out enjoying the last few months of singlehood? Why would I choose to wake up at 7am on a Saturday to make it to an 8am class in Taft, when I could be blissfully slumbering 'til a more decent hour and enjoy my weekends in full?

Believe me, such doubt-full days have come and they have come aplenty. But in the final analysis, I guess I am doing this for more than 1 reason, and these are all good reasons (at least except on days when I'm tired and stressed and overstretched and I'm cursing myself for being a masochist). These reasons are:

1. While I love my undergrad course, I do feel there are serious limitations and weaknesses to it, the biggest of which is the fact that marketing is not a stand-alone skill, especially when you intend to go up the corporate ladder and be a director or head in a business or corporation. It takes more than just marketing to make a business run, and I feel that a marketing background alone is not enough to arm oneself in debates in the boardroom or even civil discussions with colleagues in the elevator. I feel an MBA will make me more qualified in the next corporate progressions to come, and I want to be prepared. Granted, I still do feel that marketing is my biggest and best skill, but that doesn't mean I have to confine myself with marketing.

2. I do plan to have my own business in the future, so a holistic management orientation would definitely be helpful. As it is now, I find myself understanding the business side of things better than I did when I only had an IMC degree. So I think it's surely an advantage. I hate not being able to understand finance or HR or even operations when they discuss their issues with me; so what better way to understand them than to study what they are talking about. Not because I just want to know, but I feel that to have my own business in the future, I need to know what the other branches of management are dealing with.

3. I want to do this now that I am still single (not for long, I know) and without a baby in my life. I know that my priorities are bound to change and there will come a time when myself is not the only thing I have to think about or take care of. So now that I have the luxury and leisure of doing so, I figure, why not pursue something I've wanted for myself and something I can be proud of as a good, solid achievement? Something I want to be able to anchor myself on when a baby gets too demanding or sacrifices need to be made. I guess, bottom line, I do not want any regrets, which is why I'm pushing myself to make it to the MBA finish line. If I don't, I know I'll kick myself and live in regret in the future. I don't want any what-ifs. I don't want to live halfway.

There you go. I guess that's it. I need to be reminded of these things when I'm sitting at home on a Saturday working on an MBA paper when my friends and colleagues are at the JT concert. Haha! Ok, back to work :P

i surrender..

all my worries and troubles to You. I know You know what's best and I'll trust You'll only give us what we can handle and what we deserve.

Amen.

needs to be met

I know I'm blessed in so many ways, so please do not misinterpret this post as an ungrateful, selfish one, because it's anything but. I do not desire for more than I need, nor do I carry selfish motives in asking for this need to be filled. I just want a comfortable, pleasant home to come home to every night and face the day with every morning. And I believe this is not an overly extravagant thing to wish for.

So, in Chinese and Buddhist tradition, I pray to the God of Fortune to please help us secure the financial means to do the condo renovations and all accompanying costs they necessarily carry. I do not wish for over and beyond the basic things included in our scope of work for the condo. Please please please.

And thank you in advance :)